Behind Blue Eyes
by rocket-queen98
Summary: Damon reminisces about how he fell in love with Elena - "Doesn't it always come down to the love of a woman?"


_No one knows what its like__  
__To feel these feelings__  
__Like I do, and I blame you!__  
__No one bites back as hard__  
__On their anger__  
__None of my pain woe__  
__Can show through_

_It was all her fault._

He'd tried really hard to stop these feelings but they kept on creeping up on him every time he thought that they had gone away. It would take hours, sometimes days, to tell himself that it was some sort of phase he was going through, but every time he thought that they had stopped, they would just come back again, no matter how hard he tried to get rid of them.

_He really tried_

Damon blamed her for making him feel these things, forcing herself into his head and his heart, and building her own little fort with a giant **X **without really trying. At first, he thought that he was only drawn to her because she was the doppelgänger, but when he found out that Katherine wasn't in the tomb, without noticing, he began to rely on her alot more. Soon, they were what she liked to call friends.

_He didn't know what friends were._

With her, he actually felt something, he didn't really know what, but it was something that suddenly became hooked on, like it was a drug. He began to feel relaxed when he spent time with her, he began to let his guard down without ever noticing it. The first time he made her smile, he felt butterflies in his stomach, and wanted to be the cause of that all the time. And he then remembered that was what he felt when he fell in love with Katherine, only this time, it wasn't fake, it was something much more, more _special_.

_It was real_

Normally, anyone in love would have a skip in their step, and become much more happier, but this wasn't the case for Damon, his happiness was cut short when he found out he was in love. The reason was his brother, and instead of showing the love, which he knew there was no way of getting that feeling in return, his anger took control but also the worst feeling of all.

_Jealousy_

This mixed in with his anger, and for Damon, that wasn't a good combination. He would lie awake at night knowing that there wasn't going to be a chance to show the love he had for her. That he would never wake up in the morning to her smiling face, that he would never dry away her tears when she was scared. He would never get to take her to the dances and show the world that she was finally _his_. But most of all, he would never get to kiss her, no matter how much he would like too. Not Damon, he would never be that lucky, because she had _him_.

_That was Stefan_

He was the pure one, that always, without ever trying, get the girl. No matter how much Damon proved himself, saving her life, protecting her friends, taking beatings from people who were much older than him, she never really noticed because she was his brother's girl. Stefan was the good brother, the safe one, who's love was above anyone else's and Damon was the bad one, his love was toxic and deadly. He would gladly lay down and die for her if he had to.

_He deserved it_

He'd worked so hard to be the better man, but no matter how hard he tried to overcome his dark side, he kept on getting pulled in because of the rejections. No-one ever gave a second thought to his feelings for once, he worked hard to keep everyone else happy, but they never tried to consider his. The mask he wore would always protect, but the pain would always get to him, always keep him awake at night, trying to better himself.

To be worthy of her love

But it never worked, she would always run in the arms of his younger brother, who didn't deserve her love in the first place. He always got her into danger, always lied to protect her, whereas Damon was honest, and he always ended up getting blamed for it. So she would run into his arms, and leave Damon out in the cold, looking for something, anything, to hold onto, to give him that tiny bit of hope.

_But as always, he was on the outside looking in._

He just wanted to be loved for once, to be needed and wanted. He just wanted to rest with someone, to count on anyone but himself. Someone who didn't see him as this monster, but as a man who has always fought for love, but always got rejected in the end. Someone to choose him for once, to notice that he would do anything and everything for them, and for one, to feel the same for him. Someone to accepted him for who he was, not try to change him. But that one person, the only person who he felt that he could trust that with, trust his heart with, would never feel the same back.

_Elena _

He was right; It **always** came down to the love of a woman.

**Please be nice and _review_, i did work hard on this. I know it's really short, but i had it in my head all day and couldn't really figure out how to word it. I hope that you enjoyed it though!**


End file.
